Your Rubik’s cube game is weak compared to this pimp.

A lady in China super glued her eyes shut when she thought she grabbed her eye drops, but she grabbed super glue.  The doctor carefully separated her eyelids, and her eyes weren’t damaged because of her contacts! WOW! My sister glued her lips shut when she was 4 or 5 years old. She thought the super glue was chapstick. No effing thank you.

An elderly nun was busted shoplifting in Pennsylvania. She stole a little over $20 worth of soap and coffee. Listen to this lady at the end of the news story, so ho that was in the store said “”Terrible. Humanity’s gone to hell, to put it bluntly. It’s not good anymore.” REALLY? The nun stealing 20 bucks worth of soap and coffee is the sign of end times for you? Not the priests diddling young boys? That wasn’t a clear sign, for you, that “humanity’s gone to hell?” Pssssshhhh. Anyway, the po po checked on the convent, the nun is “of sound mind,” but that’s according to the church, and well, they’ve been known to lie to protect their own. The sister will end up probably just paying a fine.

CBS News filed an open records request regarding the gun involved in Kurt Cobain’s death . As a result, the detective currently in charge of the case posted a pic of the rifle.  Kurt’s death still bums me out, ugh. Tons of conspiracy theories surrounding his suicide, what do you believe?