Robert Santoli is a Wheel of Fortune FANATIC. He even has a WOF message board called Buy A Vowel, where fans trade strategies and WOF stories. He explains how he ended up solving this puzzle so quickly in this article.  Show prep pays off! hahaha!

This dude was busted with over 1400 bags of heroin in his butthole. ERMERGHERD. Even if they’re super tiny bags, it’s still 1400 effing bags in your bunger. It had to take homeboy a while to stretch out his prison wallet that much. Some really effed up part of me wants a gif of them finding the stashed baggies.

The next 2 news stories will tick you off….I apologize in advance.

First one is about Raymond Schwab, a veteran who using medical marijuana to cope with PTSD.  His wife and family were getting ready to move to Colorado when the state came in and took 5 of their 6 kids because of alleged emotional abuse. The charges were dropped, but the kids are still in foster care. It’s been almost a whole year!!! He’s on hunger strike now, hoping the media attention will help get his kids back.

Second one is about the Shattuck family from Michigan, who opened a medical marijuana dispensary. They went above and beyond to make sure their business was on the up and up, including asking the local Drug Task Force to come by and make sure the dispensary was legit. Instead of helping out the Shattucks the DTF conducted “controlled buys” at the dispensary and then raided them. In addition to charging the Shattucks with a variety of marijuana-related drug crimes, they took a lawnmower, a bicycle, their daughter’s birthday money, their marriage certificate and numerous other belongings.  After the charges were finally dropped (due to entrapment) many items that were taken during the raid still haven’t been returned, and some items were returned broken.  All of this is totally legal and really highlights how badly we need universal marijuana laws and revisions of our asset forfeiture laws.