My favorite story yesterday came out of Grant County, WI.  The only reason the story was so effing great was because of how it evolved, or devolved, I guess is more appropriate. So it was initially reported that there was a giant, pet and child eating snake in Dickeyville, so large it covered the width of both lanes of traffic (about 10-15 feet). “FEAR THE PYTHON!” the Grant County cops said….but then… there were further developments… turns out, it was a bull snake, which is native to Grant County and it was only 50-70 inches, so half of what the initial report was. LOL. Too funny.  Mass snake hysteria in Dickeyville! Hide yo’ kids, hide yo’ pets!

Remember when that old dude from Adams County that got a DUI and blamed the beer battered fish he ate? Well, they sentenced him to 7 years in prison. Which is a BFD in Wisconsin! I thought he’d get the minimum. To review, 76 year old John Przybyla got his 10th DUI back in 2014.  When the cop pulled him over and said he smelled alcohol on John’s breath, homeboy claimed it was from the beer battered fish he ate earlier in the evening.  Oye oye oye.  A for creativity. F for drinking and driving.

There’s an internet campaign (#nextbond) to get Gillian Anderson to be the next Bond.  Jane Bond.  I like the idea, but I almost think it has to be a spin off. If we replace the regular James Bond with a chick, omg, lots of dudes will lose their minds, but Gillian Anderson!!! COME ON!!! SHE ROCKS!!!!!!!!!

Pornhub has a new app to help you get in to shape, Bangfit. You can pick one, two or three players, then you replicate the sex scenes on the screen, and burn calories! Eventually you’ll be able to monitor your calorie expenditure with a Bangfit Belt, hell yeah! Right now the website and app are in beta mode, and the belt is just an idea, but I feel like we’re on the right track!